Mood Watch - 29

An inability to sleep more than two or three hours at a stretch has replaced that long spell of hypersomnia. Taking a nap here and there mitigates this a bit, but I’m still managing only about five hours’ sleep out of every twenty-four. The good news is that I’m energetic enough to catch up on a lot of things, and I have no trouble focusing on my work (distractibility is a symptom of hypomania and therefore one of the things I watch for). The bad news is, I’m managing only about five hours’ sleep out of every twenty-four.

Last week I had a routine consult with my psychiatrist. I briefly reviewed my mood and energy level over the past month. She wrote the usual prescription for my meds. A thought occurred to me, something I’d heard somewhere. I asked, “Is it true that this illness tends to subside with age, that I’ll ever get beyond it?”

She eyed me sympathetically. “No,” she said. “No. You never will.”